Between Darkness and Light, Part 2

By Isis Osiris

It's dark again. I'm back in the room. And the light and dark are stronger. I can feel them pulling on each other. Again, they are equally strong, and each prevents the other from taking me. Once again, the decision is up to me. I cannot stay here, that much I know. The longer I am here, the less certain I am of anything. I must choose one or the other. The light seems comforting, but there is a coldness in that comfort. I remember choosing the light before, but now I am back. Where did I go? Perhaps the dark will hold some answers for me. I once again run with all my strength, this time through the wall of light and into the inky blackness. This time there is no light, only darkness surrounding me. I am afraid, for the dark is entwining itself around and through me. And then even that fades, leaving me, once again, in nothing.

"Spike?" I murmur as my eyes flutter open.

"Yes, pet?" He was sitting there, watching me sleep. How sweet.

"I'm hungry." I sit up and face him. "And bored."

"I'll bet you are. Here you go. Drink up." He hands me a glass, which I eye distastefully.

"It's cold. Can't I get my own?" My eyes light up at the thought of a hunt.

"Willow, you're weak. I already told you that. Besides, it's day. I really wouldn't suggest that you go out right now, unless you never want to hunt again. And believe me," he leans in close to me, staring deep into my eyes, looking into the demon that now replaces my soul, "it's worth the wait."

"All right." I pout, taking the glass from him. I drain the contents slowly, savoring the rich bittersweetness of the crimson liquid. I hand the glass back to Spike. "But I'm still bored."

"Well, then. We'll just have to do something about that, won't we?"

* * *

The sun is descending. I can feel it in my veins. It is time for the hunt. Spike said I could choose the first victim tonight, in celebration of my birth. But I don't want to kill anyone yet. I want to play first. My parents are out of town, as usual, so I can't play with them yet. So we'll go visit some old friends first.

"Ready, Princess?" Spike calls me from the doorway.

"Of course, Milord." I rise from the vanity stool and glide to stand beside him. He takes my hand in his and together we walk out into the night.

* * *

"Look at them, Spike. They look so sad. They shouldn't be sad, it's not good." I point to where Xander, Cordelia, and Oz sit watching the naïve residents of Sunnydale dance.

"They look like they're mourning the loss of a dear friend. Now who could they be missing?"

"I don't know. Maybe they miss Buffy. Who else could it be? After all, they don't have that many friends, and I'm right here."

"Why don't you go find out what's making them so sad, ducks?" I leave him with a sly smile and make my way over to the group.

"Hey guys. What's up?"

"Nothing. Buffy's still gone, and now Willow's --"

"Right here." Oz interrupts Xander, unfazed by my presence.

"Willow? You're here? Of course you're here. If you weren't here, I couldn't be talking to you. Where were you? We got a letter saying you were gone and never coming back."

"Xander, whoa. Not so tight. I need to breathe too." He releases me from the tight embrace and I pretend to gasp for air. "I know I said I'd be gone, but things changed, and now I'm back. Cordelia, you okay?" The girl continues to stare at me.

"When did you learn to accessorize? You look… like you actually glanced at a fashion magazine from this year."

I looked at my clothes: a green velvet top and a long black skirt with a side slit. Spike had taste, that much was certain. "Oh, I just felt like dressing up a bit, that's all. Now, why were you looking all sad when I came in?"

"Well, you said… We thought you were…" Xander fumbles for the right word.

"Dead?" Cordelia supplies the missing adjective.

"You gave up on me that fast? Remind me never to play an April Fool's joke on you. But everything's alright now, right? Well, except that Buffy's still gone, and Sunnydale is still on a Hellmouth."

"Yeah, that pretty much sums it up." Oz concurs.

"Well, if we have no reason to be sad, let's party!" Cordelia protests weakly as Xander drags her out to the dance floor.

"They look so happy together, don't they, Oz?"

"Yeah. Hey, Willow, I need to talk to you about something, okay? And it's not really something I can do with lots of people around."

"Oh. Do you want to go outside? There's not many people out there and we could talk."

"Sure." He takes my hand and leads me out to the alley behind the Bronze. "Now, before I go into this, I need to ask you a question."

"Okay."

"Are you over Xander?"

"Yeah, I am. I mean, it wasn't easy, but I'm okay with it now. And I'm happy for the two of them. Cordy makes him happy, and he deserves it. So yeah, I'm over him."

"Good. That makes what I'm about to say easier. When we got your letter, it nearly tore us apart. First Buffy left us unprotected, and then you disappear and say you'll never be back. Willow, I was at your house that night. Why didn't you say anything?"

"Oz, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to --" How much longer am I going to have to be innocent Willow? I don't know how much of this I can take. It's a good thing we ate before we came, or Oz would be suffering from severe anemia right now, and then I couldn't play.

"No, let me finish. The others were upset, but it hit me really hard. You were gone. I'd never thought about what would happen if you weren't part of my life. I'd taken your presence for granted, and then… you weren't there anymore. I didn't like that. I barely survived the last two days."

"Oh, Oz. I'm so sorry."

"Willow, promise me you won't do that again. I can't stand to think that one day you'll suddenly not be here any more."

"I can't do that, Oz." Oh, goody. Here comes the fun part.

"Why not. You said you were back. You don't have to leave again, do you?"

"No, I'll be around for a bit."

"Then why --"

"Because I'm not that Willow anymore." I watch his face as my own morphs into its demonic visage. "Sorry, Oz, but your girlfriend is dead." I kiss him once, then walk away, leaving him to his confusion. "Your girlfriend is dead, Wolfie." My face changes back as I re-enter the Bronze. I have to get out fast, before Oz comes to his senses enough to come back in. I approach Xander and Cordelia, who are still dancing. "Hey, I'm gonna call it quits and go home. It's been a rough day."

"Okay, Wills. We'll see you later." Xander and Cordelia's eyes never left each other. It'll be so much fun to destroy them. I walk towards the exit and join Spike.

"Let's go. I've had my fun."

"How was it?"

"Definitely worth the wait. You were right, my black prince. But all that fun made me hungry again. Could we stop for a snack on the way home?"

"Anything for you, my red queen."

Hand in hand, we roamed the streets of Sunnydale, in search of dessert.