Between Darkness and Light, Part 17

"You think I did this on purpose?" I ask. "You think that I would do something like that to you… that I *could* do something like that to anyone, let alone you? How could you?"

"Will… I… I'm sorry."

"And that's supposed to fix everything? It certainly didn't when it was the other way around. But I guess that's just one of those Sire/Childe things, huh? I have to give an explanation and be punished, but you can just say you're sorry, and all's right with the world."

"No it isn't!" Spike's growl tears me from my own tirade, and I sit silently for a few moments, waiting for him to continue. "I am sorry, but that's not an excuse. I… I don't have one. I'm not really used to the whole 'having a reason for what I do' thing, so work with me, okay?" I nod for him to go on.

"I worry about you, pet. It's true, I saw a lot of Drusilla in you. But I saw what she might have been… Drusilla in all her glory. And then I saw it start to fade away. I shut you away in here, hoping that whatever it was couldn't get to you. But it did. And the other day when you wanted to go out without me, I was scared of losing you."

"Spike, you don't have to do this…"

"Yes I do! Now just listen to me. I didn't know what to do. You were becoming Dru, and there was nothing I could do about it. I needed something to blame, and - "

"And I was there."

"Yeah. No! I didn't want to, but it was the only thing that made sense. I kept talking about Dru, and you kept becoming more like her."

"I don't want to be Drusilla. I don't want to go insane. But I don't want to be a toy you can lock up when you're done playing, either."

"I don't want it either, pet. What should we do to make it right. It won't be easy. Demons don't change easily, but I'm willing to try."

"How about a fresh start? We'll go somewhere else, and start over as if none of this ever happened, except that I'm still a vampire."

"All right, Red. I wanted to leave Sunnydale soon, too. That's why I came in here in the first place. Lucius found something, or thinks he did, anyway."

"What?"

"Your… condition… is being caused by Sunnydale. Or more specifically, people in Sunnydale."

"Who?"

"The Slayer."

"What? That's impossible! She's not - " Oh, good one, Rosenberg. Tell the vampire that the Slayer's gone and you've known about it. Now just tell him that you've been consorting with the enemy.

"She's not what, pet?"

"She's…" Now what? "She's not capable of that kind of thing. That's powerful magic. She's a Slayer, not a Witch."

"No, but her Watcher knows spells."

"Giles? You think Giles did this to me? But why?"

"Think about it. He knew you were a vampire. He knows spells. You lost your memory after you attacked him. It makes sense." Will, just go along with the nice vampire. He'll stop asking questions, and you can leave like Giles suggested.

"I guess you're right. I just don't see why he would do that to me. I was - "

"It doesn't matter what you were. It's what you are. He can't accept it. It is his duty to destroy what you've become, and that is why we need to leave as soon as possible."

"Where will we go?"

"Anywhere you wish, pet. I thought we'd tour Europe for a while, and once he's forgotten about you, we can come back and get your revenge. Now," He stood and pulled me up beside him, "We'll have one last night of fun in Sunnydale, and tomorrow we'll make all the arrangements to leave."

I pick up the dress that still lay on the floor, and cross to the bed. Spike moves to the door so that I may have my privacy. As he steps out of the room, I call out to him. "Spike?"

"Yes, ducks?"

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"Taking care of me. Caring for me. Everything."

"The pleasure is all mine. Thank you for letting me."

THE END